An upset outing

Ok, well, let's continue writing my blog...To night i tend to spend my night at bbg because my room full of people, and they are busy studying for their test, it is not a good idea to disturb them, or i can say, occupying the space, making the atmosphere more suffocating. And I also need some privacy to write my blog.
Well, let's continue my previous story that i have my words to tell about why I was upset during my official birthday, especially the outing at the night. I was being promised too much and i put too much expectation on it, but finally lead to disappointment. Actually that day i was about to plan spending the day alone, like going mid-valley see things and had a nice meal. I tended to do so because I didn't want any promises from the others but they broke them eventually. It would upset me, especially for those I expected. But it has happened. ZEN said he wanted to accompany me, so as Joee and wern yet...I was happy because there were friends willingly to spend time with me for my birthday...In the evening, I received message from yoke ting, she said she is going to mid-valley also with her gang, and asked me whether wanna join them, of course I said yes! I started to expect the outing, I really thought they will hang out with me, together celebrated my birthday since i din't notice any cad-cam girls around at the night of celebration. But somehow, I was so upset in the end of story...
First thing is i was waiting for my roomates back, I have prepared nicely to set me ready for the outing, since I really need to do some surveys at mid-valley, so i didn't want any delay. And they have promised me to eat dinner at Kim Gary together. I waited until 6.30pm, my roomates came back, and they said they have eaten the du food...What the---! I thought we were going to have dinner together outside, why they ate first but never tell me? This is the first 'aeroplane'. Wern Yet, who I thought is going out with me, and also his gang, they were actually ready to go out after dinner, but they never suppose that I thought I was joinning them...This is the second aeroplane..Forget it, I still have ZEN, KEN and Joee, but when I was back to room after my dinner, ZEN was there, and he was washing his clothes! Didn't he ever think that I was rushing? And then joee, he was playing squash at 6th college!! And he forgot the outing! And we did call him lots of time, he never reply...I really felt sad and angry at that time, that was the third aeroplane...But I still wanted to control my temper...I couldn't get angry during my birthday...That time my mood was totally spoiled...somemore I need to wait my roommates to get ready, I was well-prepared and waiting there, but they still seems like pocrastinating...Haiz...ok, fine! That time I was about to cancel my outing, but somehow, I couldn't be selfish like that, I felt like they were not going out for me but I were the one who going out for them instead! I really had no mood, but I knew it was not so good that i burst out on the spot, I needed to control...I din't know the way to make me feel better, all I wanted was being alone, calming down my mind! Yes, it does work for me when I was dull...So I was being irresponsible that I seperated myself with ZEN and KEN, pity them! I knew it was stupid and shouldn't be done, but sorry, I really din't know how to face them when i was really moody...Perhaps it was a good chance for them to improve the 'roommateship', haha! I went through almost all the male shops to search for my desired 'matb 2' shirt, but all of them were damn expensive! I took some pictures on the center court since there were creative exhibition. Until my mind was calm, so I sms my roommates for movie, and i met them again at the top floor. But however, my mood was not fully recovered yet, although ZEN and KEN were trying to joke with me, but my mood was just like that! I was sorry and thanks for being nice to please me...I really appreciated it! Haiz...I knew I actually looking for something but just it couldn't be fulfill somehow. After the stupid 'chunli' movie, we took the taxi and back to UM and i never met the cad-cam gang in mid-valley.
I knew I was quite emotional sometimes, and when I was upset, everything seems like going wrong, and i would start blaming other people...And it's not a virtue that should be carried on, this is my weakness, I should change it...Although from my words, the one who did wrong sounds like other people, but I really shouldn't blame them, if I stand on their view, I would know there is nothing that I thought it should have been. So, I need to learn to be optimistic, if I show out my anger, it would bring trouble for my friend also...